Finding My Blogging Voice

April 2, 2014

*warning: this is a long one!

I didn’t post on Monday. This might not seem like a big deal to you, and likely you didn’t even notice, but trust me, I did. I cannot remember the last time I skipped a Monday post. I really like posting on Mondays. It makes me feel like I’ve started my week off on the right foot and reinvigorates my love for this beautiful community I am proud to be a part of. 

But this Monday was different.

I actually had a post written, but at 2:00 AM I decided to unschedule it. After tossing and turning in bed I realized that my intuition was telling me that this post was not authentically “me”. I was stressing over how my words would be interpreted, if I even had the authority to speak knowledgeably on the topic or if it was even worth talking about at all. Because my gut was telling me not to post it, I didn’t. Two days later I am happy I didn’t. It’s given me time to reflect on both the content of the post and why I had such a hard time sharing it. *edited: In some sick turn of events I accidentally scheduled that post for this morning so I guess I ended up sharing it anyway. FML.

When I first started blogging no one knew about my blog. At least no one in my “real life”. It was easy for me to talk about whatever I wanted because I felt anonymous. Eventually I did open up to sharing my blog with my friends and family and began connecting with other bloggers in the healthy living community. I do not regret this decision one bit. I’ve learned more about myself and what I feel passionate about in the last year of blogging than I have in the last 5 years! I attribute a lot of this to my own blog, but also to the amazing bloggers who inspire me everyday.

In the 402 days I’ve been blogging I have become increasingly aware of my readers. Having readers is a great thing. Who doesn’t want people to read their blog?! I could not be more grateful for the people who come here everyday or stop by every so often. Your opinions matter to me, what you want to see matters to me. I want you to come here and enjoy a recipe or a workout or at the very least a good laugh about the ridiculous events that go down in my life. 

Then there are my friends, family and fellow bloggers who I love dearly but are very quick to share their opinions with me.

blog quotes

Don’t get me wrong, I ask for a lot of feedback too. This is something that I will likely continue to do, but I need to start taking this feedback with a grain of salt.

I have a tendency of letting in too many voices. I let these voices dictate my decisions and I lose myself in the process. I’ve been finding that despite the millions of thoughts coursing through my head, I have very little to say. Mainly because I’ve let other people’s opinions (both direct and indirect) become infiltrated with my own. This can be confusing, contradictory and just plain exhausting. 

Lately I have felt far more inspired in the kitchen and with my camera than I have with my words. I don’t have profound thoughts or insights to share but I do have an insane amount of foodie creativity pulsing through me.

Maybe I’ll post too many recipes for you, or maybe you’ll be totally stoked about this. Maybe next week I’ll rediscover my inner buddha and guru Davs will pretend like she has something worthwhile to say. Or maybe you’re pissed that The Healthy Maven is now more than just a hobby for me, it is a business. 

I want to consider your opinions, they matter to me. I want to post recipes you want to see and want to make. I want you to also feel like I am present when I post. That I am 100% authentic with everything I have to say. But I’ve also come to realize that I can’t please everybody.

When I try to be something I am not, I forget who I am in the first place. 

This post is my way of finding my blogging voice.

phew I feel better 🙂

Are you someone who considers other people’s opinions? Bloggers, have you ever felt like you’ve “lost your voice”?


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  • Reply
    Rebecca @ Strength and Sunshine
    April 2, 2014 at 5:22 am

    Your blog is perfectly you! I love everything you post and always look forward to reading. Your a blogger I know I can trust 😉 I’ve felt pretty uninspired lately with my posts. I have been going since the end of June ’13 posting 5 times a week. Maybe i need a break? But it feels even harder to do that!
    Rebecca @ Strength and Sunshine recently posted…Smokey Avocado Coated Chicken

  • Reply
    Arman @ thebigmansworld
    April 2, 2014 at 5:27 am

    It’s my opinion or the highway.

    Just kidding. You live up to your blogs name for a reason- and that is why you needed that ‘funk’ early in the week and removing the most. At the end of the day, we can’t please everyone- we just can’t. Saying that, if we hit ‘post’ knowing what we wrote is 100% authentic and unapologetic- we’re giving ourselves the self respect we deserve.

    When you start eating boar, I’ll know you’ve lost your voice…because it can be hard to chew. Oh snap.
    Arman @ thebigmansworld recently posted…Polar Whole30 day of eats

  • Reply
    meredith @ The Cookie ChRUNicles
    April 2, 2014 at 6:22 am

    I was never one to listen much to the opinion of others but I can see how easy it is to get caught up in other’s thoughts, especially when plastered all over the blog world are the exact phrases you mention above. You are doing an amazing job, keep it up and listen to your intuition.
    meredith @ The Cookie ChRUNicles recently posted…WIAW – Hot and Cold Foods

  • Reply
    Kelly @ Kelly Runs for Food
    April 2, 2014 at 6:31 am

    I think your blog is great just the way it is! There are million blogs out there and if someone doesn’t connect with one, they don’t need to read it. You have all the readers you do because people like YOU and all your recipes. Everyone’s got an opinion, but I think it’s smart of you to take it with a grain of salt.

    Every now and then, I check in with people I’m close to in real life who read my blog every day (like my mom and close friends), and ask if it sounds like me. I want to know if they can picture me talking as they read my blog posts. As long as they keep saying yes, I know I’m being true to my own voice!
    Kelly @ Kelly Runs for Food recently posted…WIAW- Keeping it together

  • Reply
    erin @ The Almond Eater
    April 2, 2014 at 6:47 am

    I definitely think finding a voice is hard at first….I actually had planned to write a post about this too. Being YOU is most important and writing about what YOU want to write about while also taking others somewhat into consideration is key. ….though kinda tricky I’d say. I can speak for myself and say that I sometimes see successful blogs and think, maybe I should do that? Should I??? But honestly, I just need to CALM DOWN and do things my way for a bit. I don’t think there’s a right way and a wrong way, but there is always YOUR way and if you feel confident about it then that’s what you should do.
    erin @ The Almond Eater recently posted…Realizations

  • Reply
    Amanda @ .running with spoons.
    April 2, 2014 at 7:00 am

    I’m about to give you my [very professional] opinion. Ready? Here it is… Do you, because you’re fabulous. It’s your blogging journey and you’re allowed to take whatever the heck kind of steps you want. I know it’s hard to ignore the voices of others, but just remember that following them won’t necessarily lead to happiness. You’ll just end up living someone else’s idea of a good life…
    Amanda @ .running with spoons. recently posted…. crunchy honey almond roasted chickpeas .

  • Reply
    Kim @ Hungry Healthy Girl
    April 2, 2014 at 7:14 am

    I enjoy other people’s opinions, but at the end of the day it’s my blog and I want what I put into it to be me and the way if feel that it needs to be portrayed. I listen to my gut way before I listen to outside opinions!
    Kim @ Hungry Healthy Girl recently posted…What I Ate Wednesday: Getting the Greens in!

  • Reply
    Kim @ BusyBod
    April 2, 2014 at 7:20 am

    I definitely tend to let too many voices in, so I know exactly what you mean. In all parts of my life I’m always very eager for feedback, so I suck up every little bit I can get. Recently, when it comes to the blog and thinking about content and readers, I’ve had to remind myself that the influencing voices are a small and not necessarily representative sample – other bloggers. I looooove my fellow bloggers, but I’m not writing for them. I’m writing for all readers, and for me, if that makes sense.

    For what it is worth, your blog is one of the most authentic that I read. I always feel like I can count on you to tell us exactly what you think or feel, even if it goes against what everyone else is saying or doing at the moment. It’s one of my daily reads because of that and because of you, even though your recipes are way over my head sometimes. 🙂 I think you actually said something similar to me once, but I come here for you and to hear your take on things, regardless of what you are writing about. So keep being true to you and standing up to the voices when you don’t agree.
    Kim @ BusyBod recently posted…Growing? Slipping? Or just addicted to dieting?

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 7:31 am

    This is a brilliant post! The best thing we can all do is being 100% authentically ourselves. Your blog is wonderful and the recipes are fab. Keep being you and do what YOU love 🙂

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 7:50 am

    not gonna lie, that’s a hard question. And probably why i don’t ask those questions a lot to my “readers” per se. But i think you are doing this whole blog thing quite well. Your voice is YOU. like i said, it’s why i read. well, besides the amazing recipes. Be genuine yet bold.
    lindsay recently posted…Grain Free Sundried Tomato & Basil Fritters

  • Reply
    Becky @ Olives n Wine
    April 2, 2014 at 8:10 am

    Oh feedback, that’s always a tricky one. On one hand, your blog is your business and you need “customers” (loose sense of the word…) in order to be successful. On the other, your blog is YOU and you should make it what you want! I say take the feedback with a grain of salt… You can’t please everyone and those that love you will keep coming back.
    Becky @ Olives n Wine recently posted…#29 Treat Yourself Tuesday

  • Reply
    Sam @ Better With Sprinkles
    April 2, 2014 at 8:22 am

    I remember when I first started blogging, I was doing all the stuff that the ‘big bloggers’ were doing, because I thought that that was how it was supposed to go. So, looking back at my first few months of blogging…it is definitely not me. I don’t want to post all my workouts, everything I eat all the time and post twice a day, so I stopped. It’s hard to find your ‘blogging voice’ but it’s totally worth the effort, rather than following every trend or piece of advice that comes to you. As a reader, I know that I appreciate authenticity, so I should make the effort to keep my blog 100% me.

    Just keep doing you, lady, and we’ll all love you for it! <3
    Sam @ Better With Sprinkles recently posted…WIAW: Craving Some Spring.

  • Reply
    kathy @ vodka and soda
    April 2, 2014 at 8:24 am

    davs, the way i see it, this is your blog, YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT. if people choose not to read, they can click on that little X in the window and move on. if you like posting recipes, post them! if you want inject some randomness, do it. point is, in the end, YOU are the one managing/writing/pouring your heart into this blog, not them. they have the liberty to tell you what THEY want to read but YOU have to write it. so YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT!

    -kathy | Vodka and Soda
    kathy @ vodka and soda recently posted…humpday confessions

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 8:52 am

    I can very much relate on what you say – at the time when I started blogging. I was friggin terrified to upload a post, cause I thought people would think I’m completely crazy.
    After more than 1+1/2 years of blogging, this is gone. I try to put information ou there which is important and helpful for others, but in the first place, it is my diary. It is my story of my life and of my recovery and I write it to have my outlet and to hopefully inspire others – and maybe make them laugh once in a while. Sure, I love to receive constructive critisism or a feedback, but in the end, we all need to be ourselves with our own voice to be happy.
    Lucie@FitSwissChick recently posted…WIAW #55 – #strangebutgood breakfast and Healthy Mini Muffin Recipe

  • Reply
    Suzanne @ hello, veggy!
    April 2, 2014 at 8:57 am

    Getting to know you in ‘real’ life has only confirmed how truly the blog mirrors who YOU are. Love ya!! xoxoxo
    Suzanne @ hello, veggy! recently posted…Snack Showdown: Kewaza versus Taste of Nature

  • Reply
    Dixya @ Food, Pleasure, and Health
    April 2, 2014 at 9:52 am

    when i first started blogging, i merely shared a recipe and didnt have an opinion slowly, i started caring others say or what readers like..but you know with time passing by i have realized what is important to me and my readers because i dont want anyone to come to my blog if they are not learning, being inspired, or gaining at least something out of their time. when i try to please or be someone i am not, i lose my train of thought and motivation. this is your blog and if people dont want to read it, its their loss. be who you are and stick with it. ps. i love you 🙂
    Dixya @ Food, Pleasure, and Health recently posted…Banana Bread Breakfast Cookies

  • Reply
    cait @apieceofcait
    April 2, 2014 at 9:56 am

    this blog is SO YOU!!! I know its easy to get caught up in what others say sometimes cause it makes you take a step back but there’s no reason to be yourself, every blog comes in different shapes & sizes and for those who don’t like it.. well too bad for them! 😉

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 10:28 am

    I read a really good tip somewhere at some point (ha real descriptive). Basically the point the blogger was making was that you have a lot of readers and a lot of people who visit your blog for specific content (in your case recipes) and these people tend not to be vocal. It is really easy to write posts for the other bloggers who read your blog but there is a whole other world of people reading too and you shouldn’t forget to cater to their wants as well. For example, I know that a lot of bloggers who read and comment on my blog are in the healthy living/fitness community so when I talk about something they’ve heard about, done, seen a million times before I should consider my content not fresh? Not true. Other readers may have no idea about this topic, which is why it is important. Anyway, just my two cents!
    FitBritt@MyOwnBalance recently posted…Awesome April

    • Reply
      Davida Kugelmass
      April 2, 2014 at 10:42 am

      I’m so happy you brought this up Britt! I think part of my struggle right now is that I am aware that the majority of my readership is here for recipes and are not likely to comment or necessarily be as loyal of a reader as bloggers are. Bloggers on the other hand are far more vocal about their wants though they likely make up 10% of my readership. They seem to want less recipes and more everything else. This has all been kind of confusing for me and I’ve had to clear through all of the commentary to figure out what I want to do. Right now I really am feeling so passionate about recipes and maybe less about everything else, but it’s hard to ignore those loyal readers who are here everyday adding their two cents. Even if they don’t make up the majority, their opinions still matter so much to me. I think in time I’ll figure it out. I really appreciate your thoughtful comment and recognizing that while I want to do me, “being me” also means being aware that I want to provide content that people actually want to read! Lots of love to you, gorgeous. Hope you’re having a good day 🙂

  • Reply
    Courtney @RunningforCupcakes
    April 2, 2014 at 10:49 am

    I love and read your blog everyday regardless of the topic! Your recipes never disappoint and never fail to make me hungry 🙂 and your random rambles are always the best! I was the same way you were when I first started blogging. I only told one of my friends who I knew wouldn’t tell anyone else. I have since told my family and some of my other closest friends, but I still haven’t told everyone about my “secret life” I just don’t feel the need to for some reason!

    Like I said I love your blog and I am so glad I found it! Keep doing what you’re doing and be yourself 🙂
    Courtney @RunningforCupcakes recently posted…WIAW: One Skillet Vegetarian Sloppy Joes

  • Reply
    Em @ Love A Latte
    April 2, 2014 at 11:24 am

    I think it’s really easy to try to be what readers want when your blogging, but in reality I think it’s the most authentic blogs that are the best. I think you share your voice really well and your voice really comes through. I try to just blog about what makes me happy and what I want to share. I know some posts my voice comes through much better than others though! Your blog is great and thanks for sharing!
    Em @ Love A Latte recently posted…Pregnancy Journey – 21 Weeks

  • Reply
    Megan @ The Skinny-Life
    April 2, 2014 at 11:52 am

    I only began blogging this past year and I agree with you. Finding your voice is difficult. At first, I found myself talking about what I learned or discovered on my journey. I realized over time that certain topics and recipes drew a larger readership. I started tailoring posts toward those topics to gain more readers and followers because at the end of the day a blog is a business. Having said that, I still right what I am passionate about though and will stand by that. Afterall, it is my blog and if I don’t support a particular topic or product I’m not going to do it.
    Megan @ The Skinny-Life recently posted…Comment on Homemade Strawberry Lemonade by Yum Yucky

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 12:04 pm

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with considering other people’s opinions… HOWEVER, we just all need to be careful that we don’t trust them implicitly over our own when it comes to US. 🙂 Keep doin’ yo’ thang, gurl. 🙂

  • Reply
    Ange @ Cowgirl Runs
    April 2, 2014 at 12:17 pm

    Davida – thank you so much for your honesty in this post. I also started out secretly blogging and then decided to make it public. Over time people I know have trolled my blog to find out information about me, instead of just asking me, and I’ve had people start rumours and talk behind my back. It’s hard. Really hard. I’ve tried very hard to stay true to ME so I know I’ve done my best and the haters can suck it 😉

    At the end of the day, be YOU. Post what YOU want. I think so long as your honour yourself, you’ve done all you can do.


  • Reply
    Lindsay @ Shiny Love Affair
    April 2, 2014 at 12:18 pm

    I’ve been struggling a lot with this lately as well. I just haven’t been inspired when it comes to the kitchen. I think it’s because I’ve been so busy with work. I just haven’t had the time to sit down and get creative. I beat myself up over this because I know a lot of people like recipes! Lately I’ve done a better job at telling myself that it’s my blog and I can post, write, and share about whatever I want. I just want to be me and not pretend to be someone else or force myself to post in a certain category when I’m not feeling it lately. I never want it to seem like a chore or something on a to-do list I’m dreading to check off. I want to be excited about what I put out there. I personally think you do an AMAZING job with your blog. Keep doing what you’re doing because it’s working 🙂
    Lindsay @ Shiny Love Affair recently posted…What I Ate Wednesday #9: An Ode to Oh She Glows

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 12:23 pm

    Davida, love how you wrote this, thanks for sharing! From the heart, totally can relate to it all. What blogger can’t? Hard to ignore the voices, because you want to hear feedback. But to always tell yourself this is your blog, not theirs. The right readers will come along and will love what you write. Hard to be authentic! I recently heard a quote that stuck with me (I’m a bit obsessed with quotes!) Here is the quote by Andy Worhal “Don’t think about art, just get it done. Let everyone else decide if it’s good or bad or whether they like it or not. While they are deciding, make even more art.” Isn’t this great?
    Kelly – LEFT SIDE OF THE TABLE recently posted…Baked Scotched Eggs

  • Reply
    Alisha @ Alisha's Appetite
    April 2, 2014 at 1:15 pm

    I think it’s safe to say you know how I feel about you and your blog <3 Don't listen to that doubting voice in your head. You are 100% authentic and I actually envy your blogging voice that you have found in such a SHORT amount of time. Keep doing you girl!
    Alisha @ Alisha’s Appetite recently posted…WIAW: Beautiful Day, Beautiful Food

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 2:38 pm

    I guess I don’t understand why people would make those kind of comments in the first place. I love reading your blog and if you want to post recipes with tons of ingredients every day or a workout a day or just share about your weekend, I will keep reading. It is your blog and your space to share whatever you want to whenever you want to!!!
    Kim recently posted…A Fun Way to Honor a Legend

  • Reply
    Leslee @ Her Happy Balance
    April 2, 2014 at 3:54 pm

    Yup. I totally get this. For a while I was worried about sharing anything about my personal life because my life revolved around applying to grad schools and I didn’t want to share anything about that unless I had some decent news to share. So my blog started going in the direction of just recipes and reviews. Now that I can go back to sharing my life, I don’t really know where to start. I want my blog to progress and get better and I don’t feel like sharing my entire day’s schedule with reader’s is really “quality” anymore like I used to post. So what do I want to post about? When I do do reviews, does it show that I actually genuinely like the product or does it just sound Ad-y. <– it's a word, go with it. So IDK, I'm still trying to figure it all out 🙂 But I get you, girl. And it's great that you shared this. Nice to know that I'm not the only one.
    Leslee @ Her Happy Balance recently posted…My First Oil Pulling Experience

  • Reply
    Gina @ Health, Love, and Chocolate
    April 2, 2014 at 7:10 pm

    I love this because I feel like it is tough to find that sweet spot of a blogging voice, especially when there are many different facets of your personality that are itching to come out in your writing. I think that a balance is reached as long as we are sure to always be our authentic self while writing, and taking care not to let outside opinions influence how we write or what we write about.
    Also, your unscheduled post popped up on my reader and I loved reading it, because although I can definitely understand following your gut about not posting it, it was something I could so relate to.
    Gina @ Health, Love, and Chocolate recently posted…Blueberry Truffles

  • Reply
    Alison @ Daily Moves and Grooves
    April 2, 2014 at 7:36 pm

    Holla. I absolutely love the voice and personality I get from you through your blog! Even though there are a billion and one recipe blogs out there, there is something very unique about your style and recipes. I’m a fan 🙂
    I’ve definitely struggled with trying to find my voice in blogging: should I be more serious? less quirky? more quirky? more fit-buff-y? I do like to listen to feedback as well, but for the most part, I’m just doin’ what I do, because that’s the reason for which I started blogging!
    Alison @ Daily Moves and Grooves recently posted…WIAW: Benefit Week Eats

  • Reply
    Jess @dearhealthyness
    April 2, 2014 at 8:31 pm

    I think that you have a unique and funny way to share the recipes, and I love it!! However, I do believe, that while you need to listen to your readers, you can’t please everyone. People will always have something to say, but as long as you stay true to who you are you’ll be successful. People that truly enjoy your blog will keep reading it, and enjoying all of your recipes and projects!! Keep the good work, and don’t forget to enjoy the ride!!
    Jess @dearhealthyness recently posted…The Wall-E Society

  • Reply
    April 2, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    I was so excited to read this after our chat last night. You know in your heart when you’ve “sold out” – trying to make a living off something you love isn’t selling out, it’s being smart and savvy. Do you think Queen B ever drinks Pepsi or wears H&M? Probably not, and no one is accusing her of selling out – she’s leveraging her ASSets (sorry, had to).

    If people have so many negative opinions about a blog, let them go start their own blog. Or better yet – go find another one to read.
    Cassie recently posted…What I Ate Wednesday: Nicaraguan Eats [2]

  • Reply
    Chelsea @ Chelsea's Healthy Kitchen
    April 2, 2014 at 9:40 pm

    This is awesome! The fact that you hesitated about publishing that post just goes to show how genuine you are – and that’s what I love about you! As bloggers we’re always going to hear people’s opinions about our blogs… but you’re 100% right that we can’t please everyone. So just keep on being true to you and you’re golden. 🙂
    Chelsea @ Chelsea’s Healthy Kitchen recently posted…8 lessons I’ve learned about blogging (& my 4th blog birthday!)

  • Reply
    Heather @ Run Like a G!
    April 3, 2014 at 9:34 am

    From day one, I always tried to be honest but as my life progressed, I was changing, therefore the tone of my blog was changing. Sometimes it is hard to NOT compare ourselves to other bloggers and how they run their blogs. In the end though, it is OUR blog. We shouldn’t care what people think.
    People love you and they are going to keep coming back to see what you are posting about. If they don’t, their lost. You have an awesome blog with amazing followers! OWN IT 🙂
    Heather @ Run Like a G! recently posted…#runnerthings

  • Reply
    Balsamic Chicken Salad w/ Figs, Portobellos and Candied Pecans - The Healthy Maven
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  • Reply
    Mary Frances
    April 3, 2014 at 12:03 pm

    I was actually so excited to find two posts from you in one day! And both of them were excellent, I thought you nailed both. I agree with you, once I got over the “need” for comments, I realized I looked forward to commenting on some blogs and not others. When I weeded those out, commenting became fun, not a chore. And I feel you COMPLETELY on blogging “voices.” When nothing exciting has happened, I find myself doing the same thing I see on other blogs – just describe the food. I forget I can have with what I post and that it doesn’t have to look like everyone elses. Thank you for sharing, Davida!
    Mary Frances recently posted…Dairy Free Chocolate + Bananas Fosters Pound Cake Parfait

  • Reply
    Alexis @ Hummusapien
    April 3, 2014 at 12:36 pm

    Love this post, lady. Writing a blog can be really freaking mentally taxing in ways you’d never expect. Will my readers hate me if I use whole-wheat flour and not a gluten free alternative? Will they stop following me if I take a much-needed break from writing? Will I get stoned to death if I write about how I’m NOT into whole30? It’s so easy to guess lost when you have a bajillion people soliciting advice. You do you and I’ll do me gurrrrl. We’ll always love ya. Duh. KISSEZZZZZZZ
    Alexis @ Hummusapien recently posted…What I Ate Wednesday

  • Reply
    Heather @ Kiss My Broccoli
    April 3, 2014 at 2:57 pm

    Own it girl! Own whatever the heck IT is for YOU! I have to say I’m impressed by your ability to stand by your beliefs and not be swayed. Like you, I also have a tendency to take too many words of advice/opinions…but usually what ends up happening is that I hold it all in until I burnout or rebel. For a while, KMB seemed to be going in the direction of a business, but then I realized that I was just allowing myself to get caught up in the “better your blog, do this, do that!” thing and it’s not really what I want. I want my blog to be fun. I want it to be a creative outlet. But most of all, I want to WANT to post…and never have it feel like an obligation. I think sometimes I just allow myself to get too caught up in blog world and forget about the REAL world. I want to live to blog, not blog to live! 😀
    Heather @ Kiss My Broccoli recently posted…Thinking Out Loud: Duck, Duck, VEGAN!

  • Reply
    April 3, 2014 at 6:57 pm

    Ah yes, I lose my voice all the time. I blog about having nothing to say or losing my funny and eventually it comes back. I do find it interesting that I lose it when my kitchen shenanigans are at a peak. I’m thinking my brain can only handle so much creativity at once. If it’s all going to the food creation and pictures, there’s nothing left for writing.

    You’ll never be able to please everyone; I’ve learned personally, professionally and the hard way. Don’t bother trying. just be you, be kind and do things with good intentions and the rest will work out. Oh and congratulations on making your blog a business. That’s awesome and an achievement. Good for you!!
    Meghan@CleanEatsFastFeets recently posted…Currently: April 2014

  • Reply
    Nicole @ Foodie Loves Fitness
    April 3, 2014 at 10:38 pm

    I think I’ve said this before to you, but I say that you should blog about whatever you want to blog about. If you feel like overloading us with yumminess, do it. If you aren’t feeling creative in the kitchen and have other things you feel like writing about, do it. If you want to just post pictures, go for it. Your readers have grown to love the unique person that you are, and I say to just go with your gut and not overthink it. I am so with you that a blog should be authentic and genuine — especially when it’s your biz or linked to your work. And PS – I think you’re awesome!
    Nicole @ Foodie Loves Fitness recently posted…Peanut Butter & Jelly Smoothie [Vegan]

  • Reply
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    Nikki @ The Road to Less Cake
    April 4, 2014 at 9:33 am

    I often care too much what people think, both in the ‘real’ world and blog world, and if I’m honest, often probably isn’t a strong enough word. I have this constant need to please people. Yeah, I’m a strange one. I’ve actually been holding back from sharing a couple of recipes, namely ones that use bacon, because I’m worried about what people think. I don’t eat a lot of bacon but James loves it, so I’ve come with a couple of healthier recipes using it that we can both enjoy. But I think bacon is one of those foods that causes controversy. Obviously paleo lovers eat bacon but then a lot of ‘clean’ eaters say not to touch it. And I’m sort of in the middle, I eat a little meat but I also eat a lot of plant based food too.
    Nikki @ The Road to Less Cake recently posted…Confessions of an ex-dieter: A long overdue update

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    Tina @ Tina's Chic Corner
    April 4, 2014 at 10:08 am

    I can ABSOLUTELY relate. I get so uptight and grouchy if I think I’ll miss posting on a routine day. Why? Even if someone notices, is it the end of the world? It feels like it to me. I have to decide, is it quantity or quality that I’m after. I chose quality…and there’s nothing wrong with that.
    I do consider every comment or opinion left on my blog, but in general I’m like that with life … a people pleaser. If someone starts out blogging about fried food recipes and sees that they start to have a following of healthy eaters, and as a result changes to healthy food recipes, is that a bad thing? Maybe the change will make the blogger a better person. Or maybe the change is turning the blogger into someone they’re really not. It’s a fine line between changing (or be swayed by commentators) because you want to improve yourself versus changing into someone who’s not the real you. Only the person can decide which it means to them. I hope that makes sense.
    I constantly evaluate why I do something for my blog… am I doing it for me? To appease someone who’s left a nasty comment? To change because I want the change? To change because everyone else is doing it (peer pressure)? At the end of the day, I want to stay true to myself, while allowing myself to evolve into a better person. But I am human and sometimes I make the wrong choice. I also have to learn that mistakes are okay and then move on. Blogging has definitely been a great way to learn about myself, something that is almost too hard to put into words.

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    Lauren @ Sweat The Sweet Stuff
    April 4, 2014 at 5:40 pm

    I love the food porn! And I don’t give a rats ass about calories! Lol when you eat real food it doesn’t matter, so I never post that either. Gotta stay true to you so keep doing what you’re doing cuz you’re killin’ it! In fact I love the collaborations you’re doing lately. I’d like to join in sometime. 🙂

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    Alex @ Kenzie Life
    April 4, 2014 at 11:29 pm

    The way I see it, it’s your blog, so you get to choose what goes on with it. It’s hard to balance wanting feedback and getting it with also staying true to yourself, but ultimately I think authenticity beats everything else. I know I personally love blogs and post that you can tell people are committed to. It doesn’t matter if it’s a recipe or playlist or workout or story, if there’s passion behind it that’s what matters. At least for me. Hope you have a great weekend, beautiful <3
    Alex @ Kenzie Life recently posted…Ego or Soul

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    Kelly @ Femme Fitale
    April 5, 2014 at 5:30 am

    Great post, Davida. I completely understand how hard it can be to feel like you are searching for your voice. “Voice” is a writing concept I actually had to teach to 6th grade students, and I always found it to be the most challenging of all.

    I also understand what you mean about no one knowing you had a blog in the beginning. I was the same way. I don’t think it was until friends, family, and acquaintances started following my blog (and gaining reoccurring readers and followers) that I started really writing as “myself”. You’re kind of forced to be authentic when you’re exposed like that, which conveniently takes your writing to a new level. It’s definitely intimidating, though!

    I think opinions are definitely warranted, but it doesn’t mean you need to dwell on them or take them all seriously. It’s your blog, and in order to maintain YOUR VOICE, you need to make decisions that are best for you (not others)…whatever those may be. Keep writing, lady! 😉
    Kelly @ Femme Fitale recently posted…Adventures in New Zealand: Part 2

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    Alex @ Alex Runs For Food
    April 5, 2014 at 7:18 am

    I love all your recipes…. I think I could have a interest board just for your recipes 🙂 You will never be able to please everyone and unfortunately for some reason the negative remarks tend to stick more then the positive ones! As long as you are being yourself that is what matters. If you are happy we are happy!

    As for me…. My blog isn’t even a year yet so I don’t know if I have found my voice yet…. I’m still figuring things out.
    Alex @ Alex Runs For Food recently posted…Balanced Bites Podcast with Jen Sinkler

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    Consuelo @ Honey & Figs
    April 5, 2014 at 2:48 pm

    Whenever I’m busier than usual due to hectic exam weeks, I feel like I’m kind of losing my voice since I’m not always 100% happy with how my post look. However, I’m not able to spend more time editing my pics or writing wittier posts :'( And then I press the publish button thinking that it’s not the best I can do and ahhh those times suck.
    Anyway, most of the time I’m super super happy when I write and I really appreciate my readers and all the people I’ve got to meet thanks to blogging.
    And hey, girl, whatever you feel like blogging about, I’ll be here to read along! xxxx
    Consuelo @ Honey & Figs recently posted…Granola Crust Greek Yogurt Fruit Tart

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    Good good links #33 | Let's get living
    April 5, 2014 at 7:07 pm

    […] Finding My Blogging Voice via The Healthy Maven […]

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    . link love 4/6 . - . running with spoons .
    April 6, 2014 at 8:00 am

    […] Finding My Blogging Voice via The Healthy Maven. Your blog is your space — don’t speak with someone else’s voice. […]

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    April 6, 2014 at 6:19 pm

    Okay, so I just found you through Running With Spoon’s link love post, and I was like, preach it sister! I rarely tell my family and friends about my blog. Sure, my mom read it. I think moms are required to do that sort of thing. But every post I write I’m terrified someone won’t like it. It’s too boring, I’m too personal, I’m not personal enough, I’m a “healthy living” blogger but I’m eating a burger and skipping the gym. But you know what? I read the blogs I read because I connect with the blogger. You can’t force chemistry. There are a lot of great blogs out there that I don’t read just because I don’t connect. And that’s fine, more power to them and there are tons of other people that enjoy them. Of course, I blog for a hobby and both of my 2 readers aren’t as fierce critics as I am so I suppose it’s different when your blog is your job. But at the end of the day, people can tell if you’re being authentic or not. So for me, I just make sure I still love doing it!
    Sorry, this is a long-winded comment. I just felt a wee bit inspired 🙂
    Emily recently posted…Book Review Sunday: “Eat the Yolks”

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    Catherine @ foodiecology
    April 6, 2014 at 7:20 pm

    I’m glad I clicked over to this post from Running with Spoons. 🙂
    I, too, have struggled to find my “blogging voice.” While I haven’t been blogging as long as you and haven’t make the leap into self-hosted so that I can run ads and hopefully turn my hobby into a business, I completely understand the struggles you’ve mentioned.
    For me, it’s so easy to get caught up in other people’s success, to think that I need to write deep posts like X blogger, or take creative pictures like Y blogger, or be funnier like Z blogger, but in the end, you’re doing yourself and your readers a disservice by trying to adopt somebody else’s voice.
    The people who read, enjoy, and support your blog will do so regardless of what you decide to post; maybe a recipe you adore and have to share isn’t for them, but they should respect your decision to share it and move on to the next post.
    I’ve learned, through my own reading, that people can tell when you’re not being 100% yourself. If somebody’s heart isn’t in their blog and they’re posting to satisfy a certain schedule or link-up, then the content shows! Keep doing what you’re doing; if you’re proud of your blog, others will feel the same.
    Catherine @ foodiecology recently posted…Weekly Links 04.06.14

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    You Can Do It + An Announcement! - The Healthy Maven
    April 7, 2014 at 5:01 am

    […] week in the midst of trying to sort out my blogging voice my mind went to a weird place. I don’t know how to explain it, but I guess you could say I […]

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    Lauren @
    July 14, 2014 at 1:54 pm

    Hi! Just found your blog today (from Lee’s blog) and wanted to tell you that I love it. I completely understand what you are saying in this post, and although you may not have realized when writing it- your words are very budda-like and prophetic! Thank you for sharing and keep up the great work.

    I experience the same thing with letting in too many people’s opions. I have been blogging for a year and a half and sometimes I allow too many voices to affect my vision. My blog focuses on food and fashion and if I had a dollar for everytime I heard people asking me to focus on one thing, I’d be a rich woman. I’ll find my way – but the journey is half of the fun!

    xo, Lauren

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    4/13/14 Sunday Funday - Skinny Fitalicious
    July 25, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    […] Finding My Blogging Voice via The Healthy Maven – This post was meaningful for me as I am still developing my blog and working to find my own voice.  I’ve learned it’s important to recognize your blog is your own haven and it’s not going to make everyone happy all the time.  […]

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