blogging

Finding My Blogging Voice

April 2, 2014

*warning: this is a long one!

I didn’t post on Monday. This might not seem like a big deal to you, and likely you didn’t even notice, but trust me, I did. I cannot remember the last time I skipped a Monday post. I really like posting on Mondays. It makes me feel like I’ve started my week off on the right foot and reinvigorates my love for this beautiful community I am proud to be a part of. 

But this Monday was different.

I actually had a post written, but at 2:00 AM I decided to unschedule it. After tossing and turning in bed I realized that my intuition was telling me that this post was not authentically “me”. I was stressing over how my words would be interpreted, if I even had the authority to speak knowledgeably on the topic or if it was even worth talking about at all. Because my gut was telling me not to post it, I didn’t. Two days later I am happy I didn’t. It’s given me time to reflect on both the content of the post and why I had such a hard time sharing it. *edited: In some sick turn of events I accidentally scheduled that post for this morning so I guess I ended up sharing it anyway. FML.

When I first started blogging no one knew about my blog. At least no one in my “real life”. It was easy for me to talk about whatever I wanted because I felt anonymous. Eventually I did open up to sharing my blog with my friends and family and began connecting with other bloggers in the healthy living community. I do not regret this decision one bit. I’ve learned more about myself and what I feel passionate about in the last year of blogging than I have in the last 5 years! I attribute a lot of this to my own blog, but also to the amazing bloggers who inspire me everyday.

In the 402 days I’ve been blogging I have become increasingly aware of my readers. Having readers is a great thing. Who doesn’t want people to read their blog?! I could not be more grateful for the people who come here everyday or stop by every so often. Your opinions matter to me, what you want to see matters to me. I want you to come here and enjoy a recipe or a workout or at the very least a good laugh about the ridiculous events that go down in my life. 

Then there are my friends, family and fellow bloggers who I love dearly but are very quick to share their opinions with me.

blog quotes

Don’t get me wrong, I ask for a lot of feedback too. This is something that I will likely continue to do, but I need to start taking this feedback with a grain of salt.

I have a tendency of letting in too many voices. I let these voices dictate my decisions and I lose myself in the process. I’ve been finding that despite the millions of thoughts coursing through my head, I have very little to say. Mainly because I’ve let other people’s opinions (both direct and indirect) become infiltrated with my own. This can be confusing, contradictory and just plain exhausting. 

Lately I have felt far more inspired in the kitchen and with my camera than I have with my words. I don’t have profound thoughts or insights to share but I do have an insane amount of foodie creativity pulsing through me.

Maybe I’ll post too many recipes for you, or maybe you’ll be totally stoked about this. Maybe next week I’ll rediscover my inner buddha and guru Davs will pretend like she has something worthwhile to say. Or maybe you’re pissed that The Healthy Maven is now more than just a hobby for me, it is a business. 

I want to consider your opinions, they matter to me. I want to post recipes you want to see and want to make. I want you to also feel like I am present when I post. That I am 100% authentic with everything I have to say. But I’ve also come to realize that I can’t please everybody.

When I try to be something I am not, I forget who I am in the first place. 

This post is my way of finding my blogging voice.

phew I feel better 🙂

Are you someone who considers other people’s opinions? Bloggers, have you ever felt like you’ve “lost your voice”?

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  • Reply
    Alexis @ Hummusapien
    April 3, 2014 at 12:36 pm

    Love this post, lady. Writing a blog can be really freaking mentally taxing in ways you’d never expect. Will my readers hate me if I use whole-wheat flour and not a gluten free alternative? Will they stop following me if I take a much-needed break from writing? Will I get stoned to death if I write about how I’m NOT into whole30? It’s so easy to guess lost when you have a bajillion people soliciting advice. You do you and I’ll do me gurrrrl. We’ll always love ya. Duh. KISSEZZZZZZZ

  • Reply
    Mary Frances
    April 3, 2014 at 12:03 pm

    I was actually so excited to find two posts from you in one day! And both of them were excellent, I thought you nailed both. I agree with you, once I got over the “need” for comments, I realized I looked forward to commenting on some blogs and not others. When I weeded those out, commenting became fun, not a chore. And I feel you COMPLETELY on blogging “voices.” When nothing exciting has happened, I find myself doing the same thing I see on other blogs – just describe the food. I forget I can have with what I post and that it doesn’t have to look like everyone elses. Thank you for sharing, Davida!

  • Reply
    Heather @ Run Like a G!
    April 3, 2014 at 9:34 am

    From day one, I always tried to be honest but as my life progressed, I was changing, therefore the tone of my blog was changing. Sometimes it is hard to NOT compare ourselves to other bloggers and how they run their blogs. In the end though, it is OUR blog. We shouldn’t care what people think.
    People love you and they are going to keep coming back to see what you are posting about. If they don’t, their lost. You have an awesome blog with amazing followers! OWN IT 🙂

  • Reply
    Chelsea @ Chelsea's Healthy Kitchen
    April 2, 2014 at 9:40 pm

    This is awesome! The fact that you hesitated about publishing that post just goes to show how genuine you are – and that’s what I love about you! As bloggers we’re always going to hear people’s opinions about our blogs… but you’re 100% right that we can’t please everyone. So just keep on being true to you and you’re golden. 🙂

  • Reply
    Cassie
    April 2, 2014 at 9:06 pm

    I was so excited to read this after our chat last night. You know in your heart when you’ve “sold out” – trying to make a living off something you love isn’t selling out, it’s being smart and savvy. Do you think Queen B ever drinks Pepsi or wears H&M? Probably not, and no one is accusing her of selling out – she’s leveraging her ASSets (sorry, had to).

    If people have so many negative opinions about a blog, let them go start their own blog. Or better yet – go find another one to read.

  • Reply
    Jess @dearhealthyness
    April 2, 2014 at 8:31 pm

    I think that you have a unique and funny way to share the recipes, and I love it!! However, I do believe, that while you need to listen to your readers, you can’t please everyone. People will always have something to say, but as long as you stay true to who you are you’ll be successful. People that truly enjoy your blog will keep reading it, and enjoying all of your recipes and projects!! Keep the good work, and don’t forget to enjoy the ride!!

  • Reply
    Alison @ Daily Moves and Grooves
    April 2, 2014 at 7:36 pm

    Holla. I absolutely love the voice and personality I get from you through your blog! Even though there are a billion and one recipe blogs out there, there is something very unique about your style and recipes. I’m a fan 🙂
    I’ve definitely struggled with trying to find my voice in blogging: should I be more serious? less quirky? more quirky? more fit-buff-y? I do like to listen to feedback as well, but for the most part, I’m just doin’ what I do, because that’s the reason for which I started blogging!

  • Reply
    Gina @ Health, Love, and Chocolate
    April 2, 2014 at 7:10 pm

    I love this because I feel like it is tough to find that sweet spot of a blogging voice, especially when there are many different facets of your personality that are itching to come out in your writing. I think that a balance is reached as long as we are sure to always be our authentic self while writing, and taking care not to let outside opinions influence how we write or what we write about.
    Also, your unscheduled post popped up on my reader and I loved reading it, because although I can definitely understand following your gut about not posting it, it was something I could so relate to.

  • Reply
    Leslee @ Her Happy Balance
    April 2, 2014 at 3:54 pm

    Yup. I totally get this. For a while I was worried about sharing anything about my personal life because my life revolved around applying to grad schools and I didn’t want to share anything about that unless I had some decent news to share. So my blog started going in the direction of just recipes and reviews. Now that I can go back to sharing my life, I don’t really know where to start. I want my blog to progress and get better and I don’t feel like sharing my entire day’s schedule with reader’s is really “quality” anymore like I used to post. So what do I want to post about? When I do do reviews, does it show that I actually genuinely like the product or does it just sound Ad-y. <– it's a word, go with it. So IDK, I'm still trying to figure it all out 🙂 But I get you, girl. And it's great that you shared this. Nice to know that I'm not the only one.

  • Reply
    Kim
    April 2, 2014 at 2:38 pm

    I guess I don’t understand why people would make those kind of comments in the first place. I love reading your blog and if you want to post recipes with tons of ingredients every day or a workout a day or just share about your weekend, I will keep reading. It is your blog and your space to share whatever you want to whenever you want to!!!

  • Reply
    Alisha @ Alisha's Appetite
    April 2, 2014 at 1:15 pm

    I think it’s safe to say you know how I feel about you and your blog <3 Don't listen to that doubting voice in your head. You are 100% authentic and I actually envy your blogging voice that you have found in such a SHORT amount of time. Keep doing you girl!

  • Reply
    Kelly - LEFT SIDE OF THE TABLE
    April 2, 2014 at 12:23 pm

    Davida, love how you wrote this, thanks for sharing! From the heart, totally can relate to it all. What blogger can’t? Hard to ignore the voices, because you want to hear feedback. But to always tell yourself this is your blog, not theirs. The right readers will come along and will love what you write. Hard to be authentic! I recently heard a quote that stuck with me (I’m a bit obsessed with quotes!) Here is the quote by Andy Worhal “Don’t think about art, just get it done. Let everyone else decide if it’s good or bad or whether they like it or not. While they are deciding, make even more art.” Isn’t this great?

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