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*warning: this is a long one!
I didn’t post on Monday. This might not seem like a big deal to you, and likely you didn’t even notice, but trust me, I did. I cannot remember the last time I skipped a Monday post. I really like posting on Mondays. It makes me feel like I’ve started my week off on the right foot and reinvigorates my love for this beautiful community I am proud to be a part of.
But this Monday was different.
I actually had a post written, but at 2:00 AM I decided to unschedule it. After tossing and turning in bed I realized that my intuition was telling me that this post was not authentically “me”. I was stressing over how my words would be interpreted, if I even had the authority to speak knowledgeably on the topic or if it was even worth talking about at all. Because my gut was telling me not to post it, I didn’t. Two days later I am happy I didn’t. It’s given me time to reflect on both the content of the post and why I had such a hard time sharing it. *edited: In some sick turn of events I accidentally scheduled that post for this morning so I guess I ended up sharing it anyway. FML.
When I first started blogging no one knew about my blog. At least no one in my “real life”. It was easy for me to talk about whatever I wanted because I felt anonymous. Eventually I did open up to sharing my blog with my friends and family and began connecting with other bloggers in the healthy living community. I do not regret this decision one bit. I’ve learned more about myself and what I feel passionate about in the last year of blogging than I have in the last 5 years! I attribute a lot of this to my own blog, but also to the amazing bloggers who inspire me everyday.
In the 402 days I’ve been blogging I have become increasingly aware of my readers. Having readers is a great thing. Who doesn’t want people to read their blog?! I could not be more grateful for the people who come here everyday or stop by every so often. Your opinions matter to me, what you want to see matters to me. I want you to come here and enjoy a recipe or a workout or at the very least a good laugh about the ridiculous events that go down in my life.
Then there are my friends, family and fellow bloggers who I love dearly but are very quick to share their opinions with me.
Don’t get me wrong, I ask for a lot of feedback too. This is something that I will likely continue to do, but I need to start taking this feedback with a grain of salt.
I have a tendency of letting in too many voices. I let these voices dictate my decisions and I lose myself in the process. I’ve been finding that despite the millions of thoughts coursing through my head, I have very little to say. Mainly because I’ve let other people’s opinions (both direct and indirect) become infiltrated with my own. This can be confusing, contradictory and just plain exhausting.
Lately I have felt far more inspired in the kitchen and with my camera than I have with my words. I don’t have profound thoughts or insights to share but I do have an insane amount of foodie creativity pulsing through me.
Maybe I’ll post too many recipes for you, or maybe you’ll be totally stoked about this. Maybe next week I’ll rediscover my inner buddha and guru Davs will pretend like she has something worthwhile to say. Or maybe you’re pissed that The Healthy Maven is now more than just a hobby for me, it is a business.
I want to consider your opinions, they matter to me. I want to post recipes you want to see and want to make. I want you to also feel like I am present when I post. That I am 100% authentic with everything I have to say. But I’ve also come to realize that I can’t please everybody.
When I try to be something I am not, I forget who I am in the first place.
This post is my way of finding my blogging voice.
phew I feel better 🙂
Are you someone who considers other people’s opinions? Bloggers, have you ever felt like you’ve “lost your voice”?
I think it’s really easy to try to be what readers want when your blogging, but in reality I think it’s the most authentic blogs that are the best. I think you share your voice really well and your voice really comes through. I try to just blog about what makes me happy and what I want to share. I know some posts my voice comes through much better than others though! Your blog is great and thanks for sharing!
I love and read your blog everyday regardless of the topic! Your recipes never disappoint and never fail to make me hungry 🙂 and your random rambles are always the best! I was the same way you were when I first started blogging. I only told one of my friends who I knew wouldn’t tell anyone else. I have since told my family and some of my other closest friends, but I still haven’t told everyone about my “secret life” I just don’t feel the need to for some reason!
Like I said I love your blog and I am so glad I found it! Keep doing what you’re doing and be yourself 🙂
I read a really good tip somewhere at some point (ha real descriptive). Basically the point the blogger was making was that you have a lot of readers and a lot of people who visit your blog for specific content (in your case recipes) and these people tend not to be vocal. It is really easy to write posts for the other bloggers who read your blog but there is a whole other world of people reading too and you shouldn’t forget to cater to their wants as well. For example, I know that a lot of bloggers who read and comment on my blog are in the healthy living/fitness community so when I talk about something they’ve heard about, done, seen a million times before I should consider my content not fresh? Not true. Other readers may have no idea about this topic, which is why it is important. Anyway, just my two cents!
I’m so happy you brought this up Britt! I think part of my struggle right now is that I am aware that the majority of my readership is here for recipes and are not likely to comment or necessarily be as loyal of a reader as bloggers are. Bloggers on the other hand are far more vocal about their wants though they likely make up 10% of my readership. They seem to want less recipes and more everything else. This has all been kind of confusing for me and I’ve had to clear through all of the commentary to figure out what I want to do. Right now I really am feeling so passionate about recipes and maybe less about everything else, but it’s hard to ignore those loyal readers who are here everyday adding their two cents. Even if they don’t make up the majority, their opinions still matter so much to me. I think in time I’ll figure it out. I really appreciate your thoughtful comment and recognizing that while I want to do me, “being me” also means being aware that I want to provide content that people actually want to read! Lots of love to you, gorgeous. Hope you’re having a good day 🙂
this blog is SO YOU!!! I know its easy to get caught up in what others say sometimes cause it makes you take a step back but there’s no reason to be yourself, every blog comes in different shapes & sizes and for those who don’t like it.. well too bad for them! 😉
when i first started blogging, i merely shared a recipe and didnt have an opinion slowly, i started caring others say or what readers like..but you know with time passing by i have realized what is important to me and my readers because i dont want anyone to come to my blog if they are not learning, being inspired, or gaining at least something out of their time. when i try to please or be someone i am not, i lose my train of thought and motivation. this is your blog and if people dont want to read it, its their loss. be who you are and stick with it. ps. i love you 🙂
Getting to know you in ‘real’ life has only confirmed how truly the blog mirrors who YOU are. Love ya!! xoxoxo
I can very much relate on what you say – at the time when I started blogging. I was friggin terrified to upload a post, cause I thought people would think I’m completely crazy.
After more than 1+1/2 years of blogging, this is gone. I try to put information ou there which is important and helpful for others, but in the first place, it is my diary. It is my story of my life and of my recovery and I write it to have my outlet and to hopefully inspire others – and maybe make them laugh once in a while. Sure, I love to receive constructive critisism or a feedback, but in the end, we all need to be ourselves with our own voice to be happy.
davs, the way i see it, this is your blog, YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT. if people choose not to read, they can click on that little X in the window and move on. if you like posting recipes, post them! if you want inject some randomness, do it. point is, in the end, YOU are the one managing/writing/pouring your heart into this blog, not them. they have the liberty to tell you what THEY want to read but YOU have to write it. so YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT!
-kathy | Vodka and Soda
I remember when I first started blogging, I was doing all the stuff that the ‘big bloggers’ were doing, because I thought that that was how it was supposed to go. So, looking back at my first few months of blogging…it is definitely not me. I don’t want to post all my workouts, everything I eat all the time and post twice a day, so I stopped. It’s hard to find your ‘blogging voice’ but it’s totally worth the effort, rather than following every trend or piece of advice that comes to you. As a reader, I know that I appreciate authenticity, so I should make the effort to keep my blog 100% me.
Just keep doing you, lady, and we’ll all love you for it! <3
Oh feedback, that’s always a tricky one. On one hand, your blog is your business and you need “customers” (loose sense of the word…) in order to be successful. On the other, your blog is YOU and you should make it what you want! I say take the feedback with a grain of salt… You can’t please everyone and those that love you will keep coming back.