This page contains some affiliate links. Please review my disclosure policy.

Today I turn 26. 26 beautiful years on this planet. Some hard years, some amazing years, some lost years but a life lived without regret. Nevertheless, it’s still such a crazy feeling to look back in time and see how much you’ve grown.

Just when you think you have it all figured out you discover that you really don’t know anything at all.

10 Things I wish I could tell my 21 year old self
Yes, this is me at 21 – so sassy.

I wouldn’t change a single event along my course. They’ve all taught me something about myself and brought me to where I am today, which despite the official number I am still pretty damn stoked about.

But as I look back on my 21 year old self (exactly 5 years ago), I do wish I could tell that lost, young woman a thing or two. Perhaps you are there right now. If you’re anything like me you probably won’t listen to a word of this post, but rest assured that time will reveal it all to you. And if you’re more open-minded than I was, I hope you learn a thing or two.

10 Things I Wish I Could Tell My 21 Year Old Self:

1. It’s okay to love your parents and not listen to them.

Even when you defy them and challenge their notion of what they foresee in your future, if you’re adamant and hard-working, they will come around. And even if they don’t, a little self-reliance goes a long way. Sometimes that fire under your ass to perform is exactly what you need.

2. Wear sunscreen.

5 years from now you will genuinely start to fear skin cancer and wrinkles. Stop competing for the darkest shade of bronze; It’s a dumb decision. Also, hats are your friend and when all else fails, use bronzer.

3. Love is not the same as comfort.

Love isn’t because you’re scared of not being together or being alone. Don’t confuse the two. Love is knowing that you’d be just fine on your own but your life is infinitely better with that person. Also you’re about to meet the love of your life…hold on tight.

4. Losing those 10 pounds won’t make you happier.

This message will allude you but you’ll eventually come to understand it when you hit that goal and in the process make yourself more miserable. You’re allowed to want to improve yourself but how you feel takes precedence to how you look. Unfortunately you’re gonna injure the hell out of your back to discover this, but it’s a lesson worth living.

5. All of those Thought Catalogue articles you read about being in your 20s…they’re all true.

Yes, you’ll get lamer and movie nights become far more exciting than hitting the bars, but you’ll also love and appreciate how awesome it feels to wake and be productive. Also hangovers (on the rare occasion they do happen) are THAT much worse.

6. Friendships require work and it’s okay to give up on some to make room for the ones you want to invest in.

It’s not about quantity, but quality. Friendships are precious and necessary but don’t overload your life with half-ass friendships that don’t make you excited. Friends should add value to your life and you should add value to theirs. History doesn’t mean future, so let go of the friends you don’t connect with anymore without any shame or guilt. Hold on tightly and invest what you have in the friends you hold dear. They’re worth it.

7. Doubt doesn’t mean don’t.

It’s okay to be afraid of something and then do it anyway. It’s the situations you fear most that end up being the most rewarding. Use this with discretion but unless your life is in danger, feel your fears and do it anyway.

8. You’ll never regret rising above it.

Situations will occur where you are pushed to a point of anger and frustration. You will think that acting and sharing your mind is the solution, but trust that it never is. Give yourself time to absorb a situation before you act. 90% of the time you’ll choose to rise above it and when you look back you’ll be grateful that you did.

9. You don’t have to be who you think you are.

Don’t spend your life trying to fulfill a prophecy you have set for yourself. It’s okay to be inconsistent and outrageous. You think you know who you are, but you don’t. The only way to find out who that is is to step outside your comfort zone even if it’s well beyond the definition of who you believe you are.

10. Everything is going to be okay.

Things have a way of working themselves out. It doesn’t mean there isn’t going to be some struggle, but have faith that it will all be okay in the end. And breathe, my friend. Breathe deeply and powerfully.

Here’s a couple of things I hope I can tell myself 5 years from now (Holy 31!):

-Value comes from within, not any kind of external gratification. No amount of money, page views or gold stars will bring you happiness. You are the same person before and after these accomplishments. These are things that happen to you, but they are not YOU.

-Accept that there will always be more to do. Don’t let the stress of a never-ending to-do list rule your life. Enough said.

-Gossip, drama and everything that comes with it is never worth it. Eliminate your life of these toxins and the people who come with it.

-Communicate to others when you are unhappy or upset, don’t just pull away. Probably my #1 vice in life is running without sharing. It hurts others even if you think you’re protecting them.

I’m off to celebrate another year past! Have a slice (or two) of cookie cake for me! Thank you all for making this another memorable year <3


Join 10,000+ members of the THM Community to get access to exclusive info about healthy living, products I'm loving and tips and tricks on making a healthy lifestyle easier and sustainable.

Powered by ConvertKit

Meet the Maven

Hi! I'm Davida and welcome to my corner of the internet. I'm a wellness blogger, yoga teacher, certified herbalist, and green beauty lover.

You May Also Like:

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


  1. “you don’t have to be who you think you are” I mean it sounds so simple but in a time in your life where nothing really makes sense, to have this level of clarity would be AMAZING. Just to know to trust in yourself and be different than you are now…really this is the point at which the world becomes your oyster, so to speak. Great blog, thank you.

  2. I love all of these, Davida! The love one is so true, and so is the SPF caution. I used to be lax about wearing SPF on my chest, where I really easily burn, and now I’m starting to get wrinkles there GAH! I’ve been religiously putting 30 on every day for the past year or two 😉

    1. Me too! I feel like I’ve mastered the art of SPF and I have no shame that I’m sporting the pale look! #paleisthenewtan

  3. Hi Davida, happy belated birthday! I congratulated on instagram and celebrated with you via snapchat 😉
    I love especially numbers 3 and 8. 3: I think I’ve found that true love <3 hashtag cheesy! 8: I'm working hard on this one. Dealing with difficult, unforeseen situations in an appropriate way is hard and I tend to over exaggerate quickly. But in the end I've always managed everything…I should learn from those lessons right? 😉

    1. I’m so happy you were following along during the celebrations! It’s like you were there 🙂 #8 is by far the hardest for me too. I’m a sensitive/emotional person so I feel my emotions strongly and fiercely. It can be hard to de-escalate sometimes. I try to look back on previous events where I’ve handled myself calmly and remember that it all played out for the best. Usually that helps to calm me down. But yeah…work in progress 😉